21 Good Conversation Starters for Texting

a guy texting in a cafe

The majority of us text many individuals throughout the day as naturally as we would wash our teeth or prepare a meal after work. We keep adding to the hundreds of tiny bubbles we've sent between loved ones over the years, one response after another, without really giving them any thought. Unless a new number has been received and the message screen is blank. You must now choose the best wording to use as a conversation opener.

According to online dating specialist and counselor Carmelia Ray, "starting a text chat depends on the circumstances." You must pay close attention to the person's communication style and personality type.




An open-ended query that will not yield a yes-or-no response is a discussion starter. These inquiries are designed to provoke thinking and provide information about the person you are attempting to get to know.

For instance, you could receive a straightforward "excellent" or "poor" response if you ask someone how their day was.

You could end up eliciting a longer-answer inquiry, which opens the door to a dialogue.

These inquiries are an excellent approach to quickly and easily begin a conversation with someone since people enjoy discussing their hobbies.



We all agree that texting is the best option for quick exchanges of information or multitasking, and experts claim that it may especially assist introverts to navigate social situations. The drawbacks of that convenience, which Ray refers to as the "misrepresentation and misunderstanding" that happens when tone and context are forgotten, are also familiar to the majority of us. For instance: According to a Psychology Today article, only 7% of communication is carried out through the message's content; the remaining 80% is accomplished by body language, vocal tone, emphasis, and pitch.

Whether it's romantic or not, texting may be helpful and enjoyable when used in conjunction with other types of communication while beginning a new relationship. But someplace needs to be the beginning.

Whether it's platonic or romantic, if you've just acquired someone's number, our experts provide some advice to remember when starting a text discussion. We also discuss what to avoid doing while messaging a stranger because we are all familiar with the particular annoyance of receiving an unreturned text.



Avoid heavy discussions regarding your relationship status, your past hurts, personal triumphs, and arguments or misunderstandings which can easily be taken out of context. Similarly, when you are exchanging texts with someone and wonder, “We should be speaking on the phone, so why aren't we?” In reality, you give them a call. This wouldn’t be the right situation to expect a callback. Because many people don’t want to talk on the phone. So, unless you are certainly sure about it, then only you should start the call.

Additionally, unless that is your only objective, you should certainly refrain from making sexually explicit remarks. To start a friendly and engaging open discourse through text, initial exchanges should always be lighthearted, encouraging, curious, and entertaining. Added considerations while messaging a new person? Emoji usage, your voice in the text chat, and when the communication ends.



Generally speaking, texting a new person includes keeping things lighthearted, exchanging messages about interests in common, establishing common ground, and getting to know them.

It takes some time to learn someone's preferred method of communication, so it could be advisable to find out right away if they prefer to text or speak on the phone or when is the greatest time to text you, and can you text while you're working?

Being interested in the other person but without coming across as frantic or needy for attention is the key to conversation starters. Keep it light and demonstrate your sincerity by reaching out with queries that permit more than one-word answers.

Use the list of 21 conversation starters below to get your next text chat with a stranger off to a flying start:

1. What were you doing the day before?

This could be the perfect conversation starter and will lead them to start talking about their day.

2. What aspect of your employment do you like the most specifically?

If you’re working yourself, you would understand how everyone needs that one person to rant to about their job. So, why not become that guy/girl?

3. How do you prefer to exercise?

Understanding a person's coping mechanisms is just as crucial as knowing what motivates them.

4. What gives you a boost?

Making it about them is almost everything the other person would need. 

5. What is anything that individuals do that irritates you?

Are they irritated by obnoxious gum chewers or improper email behavior? It's always pleasant to share life's small irritations with a sympathetic listener.

6. What items on your bucket list are there?

You can discuss how great a place is if you are familiar with it and like it. Give it a try if you don't already know how and the next time you contact them, you'll have something to chat about!

7. What sign are you?

Even though it may seem like a cheesy pick-up line, finding out their zodiac sign may reveal a lot about their personality. Additionally, you may study how compatible their sign is with your own.


8. How did you meet the person you've been friends with the longest?

This SMS conversation starter could inspire a discussion about their upbringing, including their family, their hometown, and how they came to be where they are today if they're open to it.

9. Which concert was your very first?

They might feel awkward disclosing their prior musical preferences, but that's all part of the fun.

10. What is your go-to gif or video for a good laugh?

a fantastic method to laugh a lot and have something in common to discuss in the present and the future. Additionally, you may gauge how closely their sense of humor fits your own. You may also share some of your favorite hilarious videos if you have any hidden away.

11. Where is your preferred restaurant for delivery or takeout?

You can discuss how great a place is if you are familiar with it and like it. Give it a try if you don't already know-how, and the next time you contact them, you'll have something to chat about!

12. What song do you play the most frequently?

It's a great way to learn about their musical preferences and see how well they align with your own. In addition, everyone is enthusiastic about the music they enjoy, so they will likely be more than eager to talk about it extensively.

13. What is your favorite movie quote?

It's a question that calls for back-and-forth quotations from your favorite films and theirs. Additionally, it's really simple to get off topic and begin discussing their favorite movies.

14. What joke do you always tell?

Everyone enjoys laughing, and they all know at least one joke off by heart. Additionally, you'll be able to share some jokes with them. Try the jokes subreddit if, like me, you struggle to recall jokes. Simply sort by week, month, or top.

15. Do you possess any repressed talents?

If you don't inquire, you might not learn about their abilities at poker, singing, or photography.

16. What other information can you provide me on your [Facebook/Instagram/Snapchat] post?

Ask them to elaborate on one of their more recent postings if you are friends with them on social media. For instance, you may inquire about the appetizing dinner they shared or discover their whereabouts at the time they submitted the picture of the sunset.

17. What do you do every night before bed?

They could meditate, take a podcast, or treat their skin. Ask them again afterward about their preferred daily routines.

18. You were (or are) an excellent student, right?

Don't forget to inquire about their preferred and least preferred topics. With this text-based conversation starter, you may find out more about their hobbies and work ethic all at once.

19. What in your life would you outsource if you could?

Is it food shopping, cooking, washing, or something else entirely? Find out how they plan to use the additional time.

20. What would it say on the warning label if you arrived?

Even if they are responding in jest, their reaction probably contains some truth.

21. What do you dislike or appreciate most about your phone?

You and they both probably have a love/hate relationship with your phone. It might be a general issue, like how much of my time it consumes, or a particular function, like the fingerprint scanner.

Check out these 100 cheesy pick-up lines. You might want to include them in between while chatting. ;)


Summary of Texting Conversation Starters

Nowadays, people have more alternatives than ever before when it comes to dating. When it comes to sticking out, being a kind person without any personality will not work.

Fortunately, these inquiries are a fantastic way to acquire the fundamentals of conversational art. A fantastic approach to charm your potential lover is to be a good listener and question asker.

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